Denial Chromosome Isolated in Albertan Leaf Fan

November 8, 2009, by Homme De Sept-Iles

satire – excerpt from Malcolm Gladwell’s upcoming new book release Denial and Defeatism

“Why else would I move to the land of denial.”  He gestures around himself vaguely and we see acres of wheat striped by two lonely highways that crisscross near a menacing blue scarecrow.

“Nobody challenges me here.  They just buy me more beer and nod a lot.  They figger if I’m from Trawnna I gotta know somethin’ right?”   A few of the onlookers nod half-heartedly.

Digger doesn’t seem to notice.  He continues, clutching the rubber Cup all the while, “I gotta land a’ Mississippi emotion all up inside a’ me.  And all I get is …”  He goes silent suddenly.

I wonder what he means but the onlookers are backing away.  He’s about to blow, I decide.

“Wait jes a minute, jes a minute.”

He sees it too.

“I ain’t no Preston Lugosi.  I ain’t no Uncle Tim.  I’m a Leaf!  A Leaf, ya hears me!”  His face takes on a Pat Quinn-like weight and seriousness.  Then he torques.  It’s a facial contortion worthy of a criminal gymnast.

want more?  just you wait…

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